Oh Jake?

[xp_scarlet_witch]

You're going to Vermont with me this week. I have a conference to attend and since someone is withholding vital information, I deemed it appropriate to not inform you that you would be coming with me.

Don't worry about packing, darling, I already did it for you. Nice boxers, did you get new ones?

Comments

[x-courier.livejournal.com]

Wait, what? What "vital information" are we talking about? I demand a lawyer!

(...Yeah. I did.)

[x-scarletwitch.livejournal.com]

You've seen the laywers we have access to. Are you sure you want to go that route, Mr. Fingers?

(Thought so. I took the liberty of hiding one of them, btw. Good luck, that should keep you busy between now and when we leave.)

[x-courier.livejournal.com]

Oh. That vital information. I'd like to state for the record that I didn't withhold it...I just, um, failed to mention it. To you. Because I've been...busy.

(One? Which means...*sigh* The only way I'm going to get into my apartment is through the window, isn't it?)

[x-scarletwitch.livejournal.com]

'Busy'. I see. Oh I quite see. We shall have an interesting trip now, won't we?

(Consider yourself lucky you can get in that way. Also, when did you invest so heavily in white briefs? I thought you were more of a fan of yellow boxers with orange highlights.)

[x-courier.livejournal.com]

Should I try the "it didn't seem worth mentioning" tack, or am I just digging a deeper hole?

(Don't think I haven't realized that that still means getting past you. And maybe I've decided to go for more of a classic look? The rubber ducky boxers could never truly be replaced, after all. Anything else would be a pale imitation.)

[x-scarletwitch.livejournal.com]

Did you buy the shovel with your initials on it or did you engrave them yourself?

(...oh. Oh. I see now. My apologies, then, since I seem to have packed half the bags with underwear that wasn't yours. But you're quite right about having to get through me since while I'm not blocking the window, I am sitting on your luggage.)

[x-courier.livejournal.com]

You have to admit, I have fabulous taste in shovels. Not everyone would go to all the trouble of having theirs engraved like this.

...And it didn't really seem worth it.

(Bags, plural? Exactly how long are we going to be gone, anyway? And I want to state plainly that whatever inferences you've just made about my undergarments, I deny everything.)